Seaside Joe injury report: 7 torn ACLs, 4 broken noses, 2 spinal fusions, and a bad hot dog

Seahawks fans went through pain in Super Bowl XLIX, but maybe not as bad as these stories they shared

If you think the Seattle Seahawks players are banged up, wait until you read about Seattle Seahawks fans. On Saturday I asked readers to share their worst career injuries and the comments section could make up an entire season of The Pitt on its own.

We had three separate incidents of fans getting injured while watching Seahawks games, not including broken hearts.

Broken ribs for Tim Drake:

“Per tradition, every time the Seahawks score a TD, we take a shot of Jaeger. This SBLX was a fairly sober game. In all my wisdom, I figured a shot or two to “seed the pot” wouldn’t hurt. Then the TDs came…At the end, I was jumping around so much I tripped over an end table and slammed into the corner of the wall and thought it would be nothing but a bruise to remember.

The next morning I could barely breathe or get out of the bed. I had broke two ribs so bad you could see the ends moving separately under the skin.”

“Popeye” injury for Seth:

“Tore my distal bicep tendon(otherwise known as the Popeye tendon)...trying to high five a friend after the Seahawks first SB victory and missed the high five”

And a broken foot for Sea Hawk Run! that totally changes my understanding of the username “Sea Hawk Run!”:

“Broken foot when going down the stairs too quickly when halftime ended. I didn’t want to miss the first play of the 3rd quarter. Went to the hospital *after* the Seahawks won and the presser ended.”

I would classify all these incidents as a level of fandom I hope to never experience.

I counted over 60 different injuries by Seaside Joe readers on Saturday, each one an experience they’ll never forget and I hope to never have.

These are the 5 worst injuries on the list, as far as I’m concerned.

A lesson first: Skiing sounds like a disaster waiting to happen!

Mobilizer is the first and probably last person I’ve ever heard use the phrase “bike accident Brazilian jui jitsu session” before. Spinal cord:

“40 years after a bike accident Brazilian jiu jitsu session popped open an old L4-L5 natural fusion. Normal staph in blood infected the disc, causing discitis, considered one of the most painful medical conditions, fatal if not treated, which it was via a 6 week pic line delivering narrow spectrum antibiotic. Finally diagnosed via MRI after useless/agonizing PT. Then S1-L5-L4 fusion surgeries, then 7 more years of pain caused by surgical scar tissue. 8 steroid facet injections, and finally this month relief via a spinal cord stimulator.”

konatrader78 wins the Seaside Joe Theismann Trophy for his broken leg:

“A severely broken lower right leg, like Joe Theismann’s career ending injury. Hit by a car while riding a bike. It took over two years to get close to normal and it has never fully recovered. Now, a one mile walk is exercise, vs. running a 4:20 mile before. Just thankful to be alive and not paralyzed!”

Signature Seahawks had a laundry list of injuries including ruptured discs, fractured hip, and torn rotator cuff. I think you’ve had it worse than most of the cast of Jackass:

“Ruptured S1 & L5 discs jumping off a 40’ cliff on skis. Took a couple of years to get back “normal,” they never completely heal but got rid of the chronic sciatica. Gave up competitive skiing.”

Blair knows the pain of skiing:

“I was a Downhill ski racer, in my youth. heading for the Jr. Nationals and thought I was bullet proof. Doing some where over 60 miles an hour i went over a bump sailed about 100 feet and crashed, I had just tightened down my bindings to the max setting and they didn’t release. I ended up pulling my hip out of its socket. A dislocated hip creates an extreme amount of pain and suffering and an long period of recuperation. Skiing is still my favorite sport!”

zezinhom400 took the full brunt of a knee explosion but with none of the modern medical miracles:

“ACL/MCL/PCL and meniscus all at once, literally on the kickoff of a soccer match with my back turned to the other guys — overzealous charging opponent took out my entire right knee while I was still in the center circle, never even saw him coming. Was in 1990 so didn’t have today’s technology. 9 mos of intense rehab followed by two yrs playing w/a brace but 36 yrs later still full use of the knee, unbelievably.”

If I gave out “honorable mentions” I could go on for another ten newsletters, so I apologize if you feel left out of the top-five. There were so many worthy ones. Like this one from PhilippRttr that is not a single incident, but a career worth and potentially leading to athletic retirement:

“Your timing is crazy Ken. At the Moment i am thinking about retirement after 30 years of football (the soccer one).

My First injury was 20 years ago and it started a streak of injuries which hit about every part of my body, right knee inside ligament rupture, than left foot ligament rupture, right foot ligament, burned my leg, herniated discs in the neck, left foot bone bruise (the worst injury),...After this one i swore to myself i’ll call IT a “career” If i’ll injure myself again. Then came another foot ligament, i am addicted, i came Back. After every Game i have lower back and hip pain as crazy but i kept going...Then finally in November i ruptured my M. rectus femoris and needed surgery to get it fixed again. Come Back stronger...3 Games Back i tore another ligament in my right foot and know i am sad but am at a Point where i cannot Talk myself into playing Games again. I love the Game but it’s Just Not worth it anymore i guess...”

I’ve never had a broken bone, nor have I ever torn anything that I know of. My worst injuries were all things that could be recovered at home (I did have to get stitches on my index finger when I was 3 because of a deep cut that still hurts to this day if I hit it wrong) and the worst pain I’ve ever felt was a toothache that caused me to lose two nights of sleep.

But your stories are unique and in this case I’m happy to say that I can’t relate. I wish you all a quick recovery and a life without pain. I’ve been on the other side perhaps, as my wife Seaside Jay chimed in with her “sports-related” injury as well:

“On a whim, I ate a street dog for lunch at work (that’s what we call bacon-wrapped hot dogs here in Los Angeles). I started to feel a cold sweat and went home early. I threw up for 12 hours straight. SSJ helped me to the bathroom every time I had to puke. I count this as a sports injury.”

Street Dogs smell as wonderful as anything in L.A. (for what that’s worth) but I don’t recommend following your nose in this case.

Did you share yours? Want to chime in on anything else? A Regular Joes subscription at only $5 per month or $55 per year will get you access to this awesome community in the comments section whenever you need a helping hand or a caring ear:

I’d be remiss to overlook the rest of your amazing injury stories, so let’s look at the final 2026 Seaside Joe injury report together, shall we?

Full injury tally

Knees and legs

• 7 ACL tears: five individual tears plus one reader who tore both ACLs in separate incidents

• 1 MCL tear

• 1 PCL tear

• 1 additional medial/inside-knee ligament rupture

• 2 meniscus injuries: one crushed, one torn

• 1 serious knee-cartilage injury

• Both knees repeatedly dislocated while skiing

• 1 kneecap separated from the leg

• 3 major hamstring tears

• 1 ruptured rectus femoris muscle

• 1 hip-flexor strain

• 1 dislocated hip

• 1 fractured hip/iliac-crest avulsion

• 1 hip contusion

• 1 severely broken lower leg

• 1 spiral tibia fracture extending into the ankle growth plates

• 1 burned leg

• Recurring lower-back and hip pain in one player

Ankles and feet

• At least 6 serious ankle-sprain incidents, including 3 identified as high ankle sprains; one report several additional sprains without exact number

• 1 catastrophic ankle injury involving two ruptured ligaments and a third torn ligament

• At least 5 other foot/ankle ligament ruptures or tears suffered by one longtime soccer player

• 1 broken foot

• 1 severe foot bone bruise

Achilles, shoulders and arms

• 3 ruptured Achilles tendons

• 2 rotator-cuff tears: one full and one partial

• 1 torn shoulder tendon that eventually separated and left the biceps retracted near the elbow

• 1 torn distal biceps tendon

• 2 torn shoulder labrums, both work-related rather than sports-related

• 1 dislocated shoulder

• 1 separated shoulder

• 1 partially torn AC joint

• 1 dislocated elbow

• 4 broken collarbones

Hands, wrists and fingers

• 3 major broken-wrist incidents; two also involved dislocation or major joint damage

• 1 broken hand bone

• 1 severe lengthwise middle-finger fracture that required pins, wire and two surgeries

• 1 dislocated ring finger

• 1 jammed and badly swollen thumb

• 8 different fingers broken or dislocated repeatedly by one basketball player, with the exact number of incidents unknown

• 1 additional rugby finger injury

• 1 hand strain from holding tequila, salt, lime and beer while celebrating

Spine, neck and head

• 1 C5–C6 neck injury requiring fusion, a titanium plate and screws

• 1 pair of ruptured L5/S1 spinal discs

• 1 reopened L4–L5 fusion followed by an infected disc, multiple spinal fusions, surgical scar-tissue pain and eventually a spinal-cord stimulator

• 1 case of herniated neck discs

• 1 jokingly reported chess-related neck injury

• 1 confirmed concussion with loss of consciousness and hospitalization

• 1–2 additional football knockouts that were probably concussions

Ribs and torso

• 2 badly broken ribs in one incident

• 1 separate cracked-ribs incident, with the number of ribs unspecified

• 2 dislocated ribs

• 1 pulled groin

• 1 possible exercise-related hernia or abdominal tear that was never conclusively diagnosed

Face, teeth and other injuries

• 4 broken noses

• 2 smashed front teeth in one incident

• 1 incident involving a broken nose and loosened front teeth

• 1 facial puncture plus extensive facial abrasions from sliding down a rock driveway

• 1 painful perineal or “gooch” injury from landing on a lawn chair

• 1 wrestling incident involving torn-open buttocks

• Zip-line friction burns were mentioned as a recurring camp injury, but no exact number was given

• 2 near-drownings while surfing

• 1 broken tailbone from bull riding

• 1 severe bout of food poisoning with 12 hours of vomiting

• Widespread joint pain or possible arthritis

Nicholas Donsky’s “strained hand” while holding a bottle of Patron reminds me of something that didn’t happen to me, but a family member.

At my sister’s wedding, my brother grabbed a few bottles of beer, slipped on the kitchen floor, and landed on top of one of the bottles, which broke off and went into his lower back and he had to be rushed to an emergency room in the Caribbean Islands, which is not where you want to be in such a condition. He immediately flew back to the States in immense pain waiting to get to a hospital for another round of medical care.

I’m not really sure how close he came to dying or having an organ punctured, but closer than anyone wants to get, either at a wedding or anywhere for that matter.

If you had other stories you wanted to share that you forgot about or didn’t happen to you, please do feel free to add them:

Seahawks-Cardinals

The next Seahawks game is six days away, as they look to get to 2-0 and do no worse than share first place in the NFC West with the 49ers. San Francisco plays the Miami Dolphins, so the Niners are likely looking at 2-0.

I’ve posted a new Super Joes Q&A newsletter for the founding member Super Joes subscribers. If you want to ask your own question this week or next week, upgrade to Super Joes today. It’s $10 per month, but if you’re already a Regular Joes member, you’re halfway there.

There’s PLENTY of Seahawks content to come this week. Thanks for sharing your experiences, and reading about others, as we get to it.

Seaside Joe 2742