Can I predict the next Seahawks head coach?

The toughest prediction that Seaside Joe has ever attempted to make: Seaside Joe 1789

Seaside Joe is sometimes credited with making accurate predictions about the Seahawks, but if we’re being fair all I really do is make educated assumptions based on historical track records that sometimes happen to be right. Every Seahawks fan who reads this newsletter is educated and just as capable of making assumptions, which sometimes will be proven accurate even when it is directly opposed to what I think will happen.

The Seaside Joe community is a unit and we’ll celebrate our wins and losses together: Can we predict an outcome that even John Schneider and Jody Allen might not be able to confirm yet? Got a gut feeling? Tell me now:

For my part, can I share and educated assumption about who the Seattle Seahawks will hire as the next head coach that happens to be right? It’s happened before and some have asked me if it could happen again:

Whether it was drafting Devon Witherspoon, signing DK Metcalf for exactly $72 million, adding the one first-wave free agent who I thought Seattle might be willing to spend big on, or nearly getting Geno Smith’s contract down to the penny, Seaside Joe has had a good run of assumptions lately. But Seaside Joe expected Drew Lock to win the starting position in 2022 and won’t be right 100% of the time.

This subject requires a SERIES of articles, but I will give you a first-guess by the end of today’s Seaside Joe episode.

I was right about the Seahawks drafting Witherspoon in part because the Houston Texans traded up for Will Anderson and the Indianapolis Colts picked Anthony Richardson. If Anderson or Richardson had been available, or if Seattle felt better about Jalen Carter’s attitude, I could have been wrong.

A reasonable amount of credit for Seaside Joe would be based on two key factors: a) I’m attempting to serve Seahawks fans with research-supported observations and b) many others who do what I do are not as interested in doing that anymore. An example would be: A lot of people who cover the Seahawks spent the last two draft cycles talking about quarterbacks (or Jalen Carter) because those topics get more engagement and reaction. But I ruled those picks out early in the process and moved onto more “boring” topics like why Witherspoon was the perfect fit for a Pete Carroll team.

Anyone could have predicted that the Seahawks would pick Witherspoon. How do I know this? Because the Seahawks did pick Witherspoon and I predicted it! Without the help of AI! If I could do it, I know that almost anyone else could have done it.

Whatever the Seahawks do, I am confident that we could backtrack from that moment to discover clues that were there all along. That includes draft picks, free agent signings, trades, and even removing Pete Carroll as the head coach…because there’s always a method to the madness and we should be able to figure out the blueprint, especially when the same people have been in charge for so long. Well, up until two weeks ago, at least.

The New Era of Seahawks Prognostications

This will be the hardest prediction that Seaside Joe has ever attempted to make.